Day 34 – Why Nothing Changes

I am awake, I am alive and this morning I am still sitting with a podcast I heard recently which featured Brené Brown in conversation with Aiko Bethea, specifically when Aiko spoke of why nothing changes.

And it’s true. When the sleeping become woke, they feel this intense shame. They (and I) have mistaken that shame to be over the actions of ancestors but that is not it at all.

Woke comes with shame over the term or slur or phrase your husband or wife uses.

Woke comes with shame over the things the members in your social group say about Indigenous people or black people or newcomers or …

Woke comes with shame over the words your parents use.

And the list goes on and on.

And then comes grief – the realization that your innocence is gone. The blinders are off. You now hear the words and realize the daggers they represent. Now you grieve the time, not so very long ago, when you were oblivious. When you could just enjoy those relationships, without ever realizing how detrimental to the future they truly are.

But now you see and understand that you can no longer ignore their words, not if you want to be part of the solution, not if you want to be an ally. Now you see that silence and acceptance of the daggers thrown makes you as much a part of the problem as them.

So, this is me, acknowledging what so many go through as their vision clears. This is me acknowledging that the journey isn’t easy, that your next steps will be difficult. But then, the steps of BIPOC have ever been easy and you can help change that.

Please do. Because shame and grief are not fatal but choosing not to speak up can be for so many people, like me.

I love you!

#ibelieveinyou #ibelieveinme #icreatespace #icreatesafespace #celebrateandsurvive #repairingfeathers