I am awake, I am alive, and I AM BACKKKKKK!!! Wiser, smarter, stronger, healthier but back nevertheless because HERE is where I love to be.

And more, I am so very thankful for the teachings revealed in the last 24 hours, teachings I most definitely needed to remember. To explain …

First off, the level of yesterday’s pain allowed room for nothing but complete and total self love and support and it was so beautiful NOT to tell myself what to do for once. When my neck said “Rest”, I rested. When my body said “Need sleep now”, I slept. I fed my body good food and tons of water. And when a random “But I should be doing …” tried to enter my space, it was quickly escorted out. There was no room for shoulds and coulds in my healing and that is just what all of me needed.

But wisdom reminded me that boredom would set in, leading to disastrous decisions if I wasn’t careful, so I chose to read before that could happen. With propped up arms and supported neck, I spent the day alone in silence with Deepak Chopra and “The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success”. As it turns out this was JUST what my mind, body, and spirit needed, to be reminded that uncertainty allows for opportunity, that happiness and love have always lit the way, that everything I ever need I will always have.

And in between reading and resting, I danced with those dang ghosts. I didn’t run. Rather I was the one extending a hand, as I calmly stated, “You want to dance? Well then, let’s dance!”

Homelessness is old, a partner that has insisted on dancing with me for far too long. But while I spun him around I reminded him that yes, I may lose this condo before this chapter is over but that I am not my condo any more than I was the marital home of my past, the home I shared with a friend, or countless other places I have called home. I reminded him that this wouldn’t be the first time that leaving wasn’t my choice, but that finding a new home I love is always within my range. He didn’t just sit down after our dance, he left the freakin building!

Days-Without-Food was my next dance partner. I acknowledged our past relationship, the months we danced together, and how I came out of that time stronger and much more confident, thanks to a slimmer, healthier me. I spun him past the full pantry in my kitchen and the stocked fridge over and over and over until he was so dizzy, he too decided to leave.

And then, the final dance requested by Alone-Against-the-World. Truth be told, we didn’t dance. Rather I stood in front of him, hands on hips, announcing for all to hear that he is now what he has always been, an absolute liar. And when he opened his mouth to respond, I silenced them with a finger laid gently but firmly across his lips. Without words, I pulled out my phone, accessing my FB newsfeed and this page. I showed him the love and support I received from friend after friend after friend, many I have yet to meet. When he tried to speak again, I showed him the emails and FB messenger messages I received. Each time he tried, I silenced the fear he carries with love received until finally he announced he wasn’t in the mood to dance.

So there you have it my friend. I am smiling as I write this, smiling as the sun begins to rise outside my window, offering me, offering you, offering us another chance to live, to love, to dance.

But truth be told, I am gonna be WAY pickier about who I dance with in the future. Hope is a cutie and truth be told, Love is the best dancer in the place. Today I dance with them, because they know the songs I love and all the right steps.

Beautiful.

Be well today my friend, be happy, be safe. You may not be able to do everything you want today. You may not be able to love in the ways you wish you could but you can still love.

Let’s do that. Let me start …

 

I love you! HUGSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Sandi